Live Life With No Regrets

I was so moved by this article written by a nurse about the most common regrets that people experience on their deathbed and thought it was so important to pass it on so that we the living could learn from the dying how to live our lives now.

Be who you are and not what others want or expect you to be. Do what you love. If you have dreams to sing, dance, paint, write poetry or learn to fly a plane, write a novel – whatever it is – do not put those dreams on hold – start acting on your dreams today.

Spend time with those you love, your spouse, children and friends rather than working too hard.

Take time to nurture your friendships and make time to keep in touch and connected.

Its not about the money – in fact it is very little about the money. Its all about love and your relationships and doing what you love and loving yourself and your life and the things you spend your time doing.

Just like it says at the end of the article – Choose Happiness – it really is your choice.

Here is the article

“For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.

I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never
became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a
result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical
details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end.
That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.”

Source :http://www.ariseindiaforum.org/nurse-reveals-the-top-5-regrets-people-make-on-their-deathbed/

Are you living your dreams and choosing happiness today. What are you putting on the back burner? Who are you trying to please or be at the expense of your own true self and happiness? What changes are you going to make today? Let me know in the comments section.

6 thoughts on “Live Life With No Regrets”

  1. great article, thanks for sharing. I live everyday for my true dreams, and it saddens me to see others whose reams are imprisoned by their insecurities, fears or unwillingness to take actions that are uncommon.

    1. Ryan, thanks so much for taking the time to share. I hope you are a customer soon too. I so appreciate your feedback and your passion.
      How are you living everyday for your true dreams? Please share. Sorry to take a long time getting back to you however I have been on an art workshop all weekend which was absolutely fabulous. I learned so much and had such fun, playing, experimenting and connecting with special people. I will post about it in the next few days when I can squeeze in some computer time away from my paints, brushes and palette knives!! We were working today with Golden Open acrylic paints which behave very similarly to oils and are soft and buttery – totally delicious. Its all about the love. Ryan, once again thank you so much for taking the time and making the effort to comment. I am relatively new to blogging and I know that I am having quite a few visitors however few comment so a heartfelt thank you to you. I appreciate you.

  2. This is such a touching article to read. It definitely touched my heart and reminded me to get on my death bed; it all comes down to LOVE and the BONDS we share. All we really need is love. In the end everything else fades away; material things, money…. etc. Thanks for sharing. I will be sure to repost this on my FB page. I’m a singer/actress/artist and I found your post on my manager Dan Spilo’s FB page. I love your artwork. One of my favorite kinds of artwork to create and observe is ABSTRACT
    Your BLOG truly blessed me. Thank you!

    God BLess,
    Syesha Mercado

    1. Syesha – thank you so much for your lovely comments and I am so glad you dropped by and took the time to comment. I agree that article was so touching and a serious reminder how to live our lives now – full of love and connection and living our passion. Painting for me is living my passion and I feel so lucky to be able to do that.

      I do feature other artists here so please friend me on FB so I can see some of your work. I am at http://www.facebook.com/originalabstractart. Look forward to connecting with you again soon.

    1. Yes Maggie, totally agree. There’s a lot to learn from this and a good idea to revisit it often. Thanks so much for visiting and commenting

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